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Although I’ve been helping others with their mental and physical health since 2011, armed with years of experience and a solid stack of qualifications, I hit a wall in my late 40s. It wasn’t a dramatic, cinematic collapse, but a slow burn that left me questioning everything.
Looking back, it shouldn’t have been a surprise. Over the course of several difficult years—personally and professionally—I found myself under constant strain. My first marriage suffered, and my finances and self-confidence took a beating. It felt like the world was pressing down on me from every angle, but like most men, I kept my head down and pushed through. After all, that’s what you do, right? You tough it out. You keep going, even when it feels like you’re barely keeping your balance.
From the outside, I probably looked like I had everything back on track. I’d found love again with Claire after my divorce, and together we built The Midlife Mentors into something meaningful. The brand was thriving, my personal life was stabilising, and I thought I had turned the corner. But underneath all of that, the weight of those years of pressure and struggle had taken a toll on me.
In 2021, the stress finally caught up with me. I found myself suffering from low-level depression, feeling constantly drained, disconnected, and unable to name or share what I was really going through. It affected every part of my life—from my work to my relationships—and I felt trapped in a cycle I couldn’t escape. I thought I had done all the right things to recover, but it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t thriving, and I didn’t know why.
That’s when I began writing The Midlife Male Handbook. It wasn’t just a book for others; it was a way for me to make sense of my own experiences. I needed answers. I wanted to understand why I felt the way I did, and why I couldn’t simply power through it. As I started digging into the latest research, I realised I wasn’t alone. Many other midlife men were dealing with the same struggles—physical, emotional, and mental—and they were just as unsure about what was happening to them.
The more I researched, the more I realised something crucial: there was nothing comprehensive available for men in this stage of life. Sure, there were bits and pieces scattered around, but nothing that brought it all together into one clear, accessible guide. I wanted to change that. I knew that men needed a point of reference to understand what they were going through, so they could take control of their health and well-being. I wanted them to know that what they were experiencing wasn’t just “ageing”—it was real, and it could be managed.
Over the next three years, I worked tirelessly to turn these thoughts into a book. I spoke to countless other men who were experiencing similar challenges, and together we shared stories, frustrations, and insights that helped me shape the message of The Midlife Male Handbook. After what felt like an eternity of research, writing, and refining, I was thrilled when Synergy Publishing saw the potential in my work and took me and my book on. Their belief in the book—and its message—was the final push I needed to take this project to the next level.
I don’t want men to suffer in silence as I did. That’s why I wrote The Midlife Male Handbook. Men need access to the information that will help them understand that what they’re going through isn’t just an inevitable part of growing older. Andropause is real. It’s not something to be ignored, or brushed off as “just aging.” It’s a part of life that deserves to be understood, discussed, and addressed head-on.
In writing this book, my mission is simple: to help men take back control. Andropause doesn’t have to be a dead end. It’s simply a chapter in the ongoing story of life. By raising awareness and starting conversations, we can help each other navigate this stage with confidence. We can take charge of our health, our relationships, and our happiness.
So here are some tips that can help you reset:
1. Get Active
Exercise is the secret weapon here. Start strength training – it’s a great way to build muscle mass, boost your testosterone, and kick that belly fat to the curb. Don’t forget cardio; keeping your heart healthy will help with energy levels and improve mood.
2. Watch Your Diet
The right food choices can make a world of difference. Load up on protein, healthy fats, and plenty of vegetables. Stay away from processed foods and sugar, as they can spike insulin levels and further mess with your hormones. Omega-3 fatty acids are your friend here – they’ll help balance your hormones.
3. Manage Stress
Stress is the enemy when it comes to andropause. High cortisol levels (thanks to stress) can worsen symptoms. Try meditation, deep breathing, or simply going for a walk in nature to calm your mind. Take breaks and don’t forget to rest.
4. Sleep Better
Get serious about sleep. Aim for 7-9 hours per night and create a routine. Turn off screens an hour before bed, keep the room cool, and make sure it’s dark enough to fall into a restful slumber.
5. Talk to Your Doctor
If symptoms are getting tough to manage, don’t be afraid to talk to your healthcare provider. There are treatment options, including hormone replacement therapy (HRT), which can help balance testosterone levels and make a noticeable difference.
6. Consider Supplements
Supplements aren’t a magic fix, but they can help support testosterone levels. Vitamin D, zinc, and magnesium are all key players in hormone production. Make sure you’re getting enough of these in your diet or with the help of a supplement.
7. Be Open About Your Struggles
Andropause can be a lonely journey if you don’t talk about it. Share what you’re going through with your partner or a trusted friend. Open conversation can reduce the stigma, and you’ll feel more supported. Plus, there’s strength in numbers.
Guys, this is not the end of the road. It’s just the beginning. And ladies, if a man in your life is more withdrawn, grumpy, perhaps isolating themselves, then this could be why, and there is a way forward.
And trust me, it’s worth it. Because midlife isn’t the end—it’s just the beginning.
My book is what it says on the tin - a handbook, full of practical, evidence based strategies - and you can pre-order your copy on Amazon, Waterstones and WH Smith.
Although I’ve been helping others with their mental and physical health since 2011, armed with years of experience and a solid stack of qualifications, I hit a wall in my late 40s. It wasn’t a dramatic, cinematic collapse, but a slow burn that left me questioning everything.
Looking back, it shouldn’t have been a surprise. Over the course of several difficult years—personally and professionally—I found myself under constant strain. My first marriage suffered, and my finances and self-confidence took a beating. It felt like the world was pressing down on me from every angle, but like most men, I kept my head down and pushed through. After all, that’s what you do, right? You tough it out. You keep going, even when it feels like you’re barely keeping your balance.
From the outside, I probably looked like I had everything back on track. I’d found love again with Claire after my divorce, and together we built The Midlife Mentors into something meaningful. The brand was thriving, my personal life was stabilising, and I thought I had turned the corner. But underneath all of that, the weight of those years of pressure and struggle had taken a toll on me.
In 2021, the stress finally caught up with me. I found myself suffering from low-level depression, feeling constantly drained, disconnected, and unable to name or share what I was really going through. It affected every part of my life—from my work to my relationships—and I felt trapped in a cycle I couldn’t escape. I thought I had done all the right things to recover, but it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t thriving, and I didn’t know why.
That’s when I began writing The Midlife Male Handbook. It wasn’t just a book for others; it was a way for me to make sense of my own experiences. I needed answers. I wanted to understand why I felt the way I did, and why I couldn’t simply power through it. As I started digging into the latest research, I realised I wasn’t alone. Many other midlife men were dealing with the same struggles—physical, emotional, and mental—and they were just as unsure about what was happening to them.
The more I researched, the more I realised something crucial: there was nothing comprehensive available for men in this stage of life. Sure, there were bits and pieces scattered around, but nothing that brought it all together into one clear, accessible guide. I wanted to change that. I knew that men needed a point of reference to understand what they were going through, so they could take control of their health and well-being. I wanted them to know that what they were experiencing wasn’t just “ageing”—it was real, and it could be managed.
Over the next three years, I worked tirelessly to turn these thoughts into a book. I spoke to countless other men who were experiencing similar challenges, and together we shared stories, frustrations, and insights that helped me shape the message of The Midlife Male Handbook. After what felt like an eternity of research, writing, and refining, I was thrilled when Synergy Publishing saw the potential in my work and took me and my book on. Their belief in the book—and its message—was the final push I needed to take this project to the next level.
I don’t want men to suffer in silence as I did. That’s why I wrote The Midlife Male Handbook. Men need access to the information that will help them understand that what they’re going through isn’t just an inevitable part of growing older. Andropause is real. It’s not something to be ignored, or brushed off as “just aging.” It’s a part of life that deserves to be understood, discussed, and addressed head-on.
In writing this book, my mission is simple: to help men take back control. Andropause doesn’t have to be a dead end. It’s simply a chapter in the ongoing story of life. By raising awareness and starting conversations, we can help each other navigate this stage with confidence. We can take charge of our health, our relationships, and our happiness.
So here are some tips that can help you reset:
1. Get Active
Exercise is the secret weapon here. Start strength training – it’s a great way to build muscle mass, boost your testosterone, and kick that belly fat to the curb. Don’t forget cardio; keeping your heart healthy will help with energy levels and improve mood.
2. Watch Your Diet
The right food choices can make a world of difference. Load up on protein, healthy fats, and plenty of vegetables. Stay away from processed foods and sugar, as they can spike insulin levels and further mess with your hormones. Omega-3 fatty acids are your friend here – they’ll help balance your hormones.
3. Manage Stress
Stress is the enemy when it comes to andropause. High cortisol levels (thanks to stress) can worsen symptoms. Try meditation, deep breathing, or simply going for a walk in nature to calm your mind. Take breaks and don’t forget to rest.
4. Sleep Better
Get serious about sleep. Aim for 7-9 hours per night and create a routine. Turn off screens an hour before bed, keep the room cool, and make sure it’s dark enough to fall into a restful slumber.
5. Talk to Your Doctor
If symptoms are getting tough to manage, don’t be afraid to talk to your healthcare provider. There are treatment options, including hormone replacement therapy (HRT), which can help balance testosterone levels and make a noticeable difference.
6. Consider Supplements
Supplements aren’t a magic fix, but they can help support testosterone levels. Vitamin D, zinc, and magnesium are all key players in hormone production. Make sure you’re getting enough of these in your diet or with the help of a supplement.
7. Be Open About Your Struggles
Andropause can be a lonely journey if you don’t talk about it. Share what you’re going through with your partner or a trusted friend. Open conversation can reduce the stigma, and you’ll feel more supported. Plus, there’s strength in numbers.
Guys, this is not the end of the road. It’s just the beginning. And ladies, if a man in your life is more withdrawn, grumpy, perhaps isolating themselves, then this could be why, and there is a way forward.
And trust me, it’s worth it. Because midlife isn’t the end—it’s just the beginning.
My book is what it says on the tin - a handbook, full of practical, evidence based strategies - and you can pre-order your copy on Amazon, Waterstones and WH Smith.
